I feel like there has been a quaking in my body. The foundations have shifted. Some of the ground has disappeared beneath me and in the midst of rebuilding there is another quaking. Much of what I've thought about my view of "The Christian Life" has been shattered and I realize that much of my posturing has been built on a foundation of fear. The irony is, and I realize that this might just be from my perspective, most people see me as a pretty confident and bold person. This is my attempt to give you a deeper look at my life.
Let's start with the political arena. Typical "Christian" positions that I have held in the past are the following: Pro-Life, The Sanctity of Marriage, The War on Terror. Some of my undecided positions but which are also associated with the title "Christian" are: Prayer in Public Schools, "One Nation Under God" in our pledge, a place in our courts for the Ten Commandments, and bringing down the radical liberal organizations. Why are these things considered "Christian?" Since when has God condoned the idea of "Christian" nation? Since when did Jesus condone ENFORCING His morality on a nation and a culture?
If the "Christian" agenda was God's intention for a nation then why didn't Jesus let Peter finish his job with the sword? Better yet why didn't He take the crown offered him when the Jews tried to take Him by force and make Him king? After all, the guy could supply an unlimited amount of food/supplies, He could heal the wounds of soldiers, and heck, He could raise the dead. These seem like some pretty valuable skills to ENFORCE His political agendas. The problem I see is that I can't find scripture to support the notion that these were His political agendas. If they weren't His then how can they be "Christian?"
The truth is His way was to lay down His life. He sacrificed His comfort. He had no where to lay His head. He encouraged His followers to take up their cross. If this was His way and the way of His disciples then what is mine? Can I condone it being my ambition to reverse Roe vs. Wade? Can I condone making gay marriage illegal? If not then what should my approach be and why does it scare me to allow the world to do what it wants instead of trying to enforce my morality on them?
Yes, it scares me to let my tax dollars pay for abortions. I'm scared of a downward spiral of immoral allowances! I'm scared that I don't know how far it could go! What if the rights of "Christians" are revoked? What happens if we are no longer given the freedom to practice our worship? What about our rights? Do we have any right to rights when our citizenship is in another world and another kingdom?
Let's shift the topic a bit. I have a fear of ministry. Most of you who know me are probably looking at this statement thinking I have lost my mind. Many see me as all about ministry but the truth is that I'm terrified to really get my hands dirty.
I feel like I've become more aware of what's inside of me in the past month. Going to a foreign country can do that to people from what I understand. My friend gave me a book she wrote thinking it might help me with the grief I feel for what I've discovered about my own cowardice. Its not like I was out to discover this stuff. Stepping out in faith just has a way of exposing you to your own insufficiencies.
Let me be more specific. In Lebanon people are trusting or at least more trusting than what I've experienced here in Texas, which I consider to be one of the friendliest states in the US. For example, I prayed for a street vendor and the man feels it his obligation to give us food in return. Then, he gives us the invitation to go to his home to pray for his blind father. He wasn't going to come with us either. The only people who were there were his wife, elderly mother, blind father, his daughter, and his granddaughter. There wasn't a man able to defend the family and without reservation he sent three grown men to his home. The ironic part... I was nervous about going into the home of a Muslim family. Way to go media!
So, here is the connection. I would never have invited a complete stranger into my home. Nor would I send them into the home of my defenseless family. Next is where it hits home. How far am I willing to go for people? Would I invite a homeless man into my home? Would I provide him shelter from the rain if he smelt bad and looked dirty? The truth... no, I wouldn't. Why? Because it scares me. I'm scared physically, I'm scared of what the person might ask of me and how much I might have to give.
Jesus spent his time with a thief. He showed favor for prostitutes. He spent time with people who probably smelled not all that different from those who live on the streets. They required a lot of Him to the point where He didn't have time to eat. He had to retreat to get time with His Father. I live in retreat. I've got more time than most. I get to spend time in coffee shops reading my latest theology book. The truth is I don't have to get my hands all that dirty and I am esteemed among friends. Though, I'm starting to wonder why...?
There is hope though. I don't have to stay this way. I can be courageous. I can overcome my fears. I can get my hands dirty. I can get messy in real life, in real ministry. I just hope I don't forget.
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Amazing post. I was confronted in class one time about my conservative political ideas, and asked if I would still hold them if I wasn't Christian. My response was yes, I would because I felt like they were moral and logical. However, I am in agreement with you, nowhere are we charged to change culture. Great post Miller. really made me think.
ReplyDeleteScott
This made me cry, Michael. I have felt these same things in my own heart, but have been unable to express them...so much to pray on. Thanks for going low and sharing real life heart stuff.
ReplyDeleteRobin
Miller,
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion, what you are being confronted with is the cry of God's heart for 1 Corinthians 13 to be the driver of your heart. All becomes empty and shallow without love.
Scott,
While we may not be called to change culture through mass political campaigns, I wouldn't say we are not culture change agents at the roots of our identity in Christ. I would say your view of God is very small if you say that He didn't call Wilberforce to end slavery in Britain, or call Abraham Lincoln to end slavery in the USA or even Churchill to end the absolute evil that was Hitler's regime in Europe. While we may not be called to do those big things, I believe that when we impact individual lives, we impact a culture by changing a family tree. If I save the life of an unborn baby through loving the mother into carrying the child to term, then I have affected the mother, the child and anyone they come into contact with. When people end the child sex-trafficking trade then cultures are shifted.
It may be different than you envision, but change culture is the very mandate of Jesus when he said to go and make disciples of nations.
Yeah, I don't think we're called to change culture through anything but love. Sometimes that love will influence the way we vote/legislate and sometimes not. I'm with Miller though on things like gay marriage being something the state shouldn't really go against. It's not a Christian country, let alone a (theologically) conservative Christian country. And that's a good thing!
ReplyDeleteGood post, dude.
I appreciate all of your comments and I'm honored that each of you have taken time to read it. I hope it has given you some insight to what has been kind of raging in my head. I meant it when I said I am scared to really love like Jesus did. God help me.
ReplyDeleteI would say the discrepancy between Christ's political posturing and ours is the responsibility of government. In a republic (even one that disguises itself as a democracy) the responsibility for the legislation of the nation is upon the representatives (and the constituents are responsible for which representative holds an office). What does that mean? It means that the legislation of our nation is our responsibility and we are responsible for any and all legislation that contradicts the will of the Lord.
ReplyDeleteLet me put this another way: is Hitler responsible for his decisions in office? Absolutely. They will be held against him at the great white throne judgment. Even though they were political decisions, they were still sins. Here's the scary part: our power to vote is the democratic equivalent of political decision making. Christ lived in a time of Roman emperors, when the responsibility of those decisions did not directly fall upon the citizens.
Anyway, I'd be surprised if anyone read that comment... I get tired just reading it. Miller, if you wanna do something scary to love people... lemme know I'm always up for it.
I don't think the difference is all that big as you suggest Jeff. Our ability to participate in the governments of "this present age" do not necessarily obligate us to participate. However, I'm not saying we shouldn't either. My writing is more of a reflection on my own past approach and a question as to how I should approach the future.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your response and grateful for the additional challenge to my way of thinking. Thank you Jeff!
Along the political side of things, allow me strongly to recommend the following (all of which you can borrow from me):
ReplyDelete- John Howard Yoder, "The Politics of Jesus" (Grand Rapids: William B. Eerdmans, 1994).
- Stanley Hauerwas, "Unleashing the Scripture: Freeing the Bible from Captivity to America" (Nashville: Abingdon Press, 1993).
- Stanley Hauerwas & Willam H. Willimon, "Resident Aliens: Life in the Christian Colony" (Nashville: Abingdon, 1989).
- Stanley Hauerwas, "The Peaceable Kingdom: A Primer in Christian Ethics" (Notre Dame: University of Notre Dame, 1983).
- D. Brent Laytham, editor, "God is Not...Religious, Nice, 'One of Us', an American, a Capitalist" (Grand Rapids: Brazos Press, 2004).
Freeing one's understanding of politics from the American imaginary is one of the hardest but most important things for the Christian in America to do. But insofar as you hold that voting booths, lobby groups, and political parties aren't the means to enact a truly Christian politics, well, then to that degree you're on the right track.